When marital problems become too much for you to take, divorce may be your best option. This is especially true when it comes to gaslighting, which is a damaging form of emotional abuse.
According to Healthline, gaslighting entails a campaign of manipulation that is intended to make you question your version of reality and what you know is true. The first step to getting help for this issue is to identify its signs, as explained here.
How to identify gaslighting in your relationship
It is often difficult to identify abuse in your own relationship. With gaslighting, it becomes even harder since you may already be confused by your spouse’s treatment. Abusers will often make a statement, then deny having ever made the statement in the past. They may ask you for evidence of the statement, and if you cannot provide evidence to their liking they will continue on with the denial.
Even when they admit wrongdoing, they will question the validity of your feelings. If you are upset, they will downplay your emotions. They may claim you are being too sensitive or that you are behaving childishly. Because your feelings are not being taken seriously, you may refrain from expressing them in the future.
Abusers will also involve others in their mistreatment of you, often unknowingly. A favorite tactic of gaslighters is claiming that others, such as your friends and family, are talking about you behind your back. The goal is to isolate you from other people in your life, while also fortifying the false claims made by the abuser.
What to do if you are a victim of gaslighting
Seeking out the assistance of a therapist or counselor is a must if you are the victim of emotional abuse. Untangling your true emotions can be challenging when dealing with gaslighting, but a therapist can help validate your feelings. From there, you will need to decide how to proceed with your marriage. While it is sometimes possible for abusers to change their ways through extensive counseling, it is best to leave the relationship if mistreatment continues.
