After a divorce, shared custody may feel like a burden. You both care about your little ones, but working together may give you some apprehension. How can you work together without arguing?
According to Today’s Parent, collaborating with your ex may help the two of you see eye to eye on parenting.
Be detailed with your plans
You should make your parenting plan as detailed as you can. The more detail you include, the less likely you will argue in the future. If you both have clear guidelines, you have less to talk about. Of course, within the plan, you may want to develop ideas on how to settle disputes. For example, decide when you can make exceptions to the plan. Can you switch visitation days for special events? Likewise, determine if you need to handle disputes with a third party.
Learn to communicate amicably
You may find it hard to learn to communicate well with an ex that you had trouble communicating with during marriage. One of the most effective rules for co-parenting communication is to consider your new relationship a professional relationship. Talk to your ex like you would talk to a co-worker.
Listen to your children
Let your children have an opinion. Never force your children to keep toys or other belongings at one home or another. Remember that both households belong to your children, so all their belongings should go to both houses. When you restrict kids too much, you make them feel powerless. Likewise, allow them to share their opinions on the custody arrangement.
Working with your co-parent may feel intimidating, but it should alleviate some of the stress when you have a plan.
